The Magic of 5 Types of Comforting Touch

When you think of “Comforting Touch”, what kind of touch comes to mind? When asking myself this question, I realized that actually there are at least 5 different categories of Comforting Touch, each with distinct attributes that are supportive or “comforting” in their own way, depending on the situation, especially when it comes to birth. 

These are the 5 types of Comforting Touch I came up with: Massaging Touch, Counter-Pressure, Soothing Strokes, Rhythmic Touch, and Holding.

Massaging Touch is often what people think of as the most comforting kind of touch for birth. Who wouldn’t want to be massaged for hours on end, you’d think? But actually, that’s one of the first clarifying principles I teach with Comforting Touch for Birth. Surprisingly, most people don’t want massaging touch all labor long, especially not during contractions. Massaging touch is amazing in between contractions, to release tension in our muscles after a contraction has passed, to calm and relax us in early labor, or for example, in the form of a delicious foot massage during pregnancy, postpartum or anytime for that matter! 

This leads us then to the next type of touch, counter-pressure. Counter-Pressure is the most commonly desired “Comforting Touch” during labor, specifically during contractions. The firm, anchoring power of a hip squeeze or someone pressing firmly on your low back during contractions can feel like magic. The strength of the sensation from this kind of touch dilutes the intensity of the sensations of contractions, while helping you feel grounded and essentially “distracted” from their intensity. 

Soothing Strokes often best come into play in between contractions or pre-labor. These lighter, repetitive strokes speak directly to the nervous system. They are deeply calming, promote a sense of safety and wellbeing, help to slow down our brain waves, lower stress hormones, and like all kinds of Comforting Touch, they turn up the volume on oxytocin, the love hormone responsible for contracting the uterus.  

Rhythmic Touch possesses all the same positive qualities of every type of Comforting Touch, but accomplishes it more similarly to the way that rocking a baby is calming. The steadiness and reliability of the motion lulls us into a state of calm. More vigorous variations on this kind of touch, such as shaking the hips in labor may not be as calming as gentle rocking, but the continuity of the motion offers a reliability that is exceptionally grounding, while also forcing our muscles into relaxation. Basically, you cannot clench your butt while someone is shaking it loose. At some point, you have to let go. Exactly what we want during birth! 

Our last category of Comforting Touch is Holding. Sometimes, you don’t want pressure and you don’t want motion, however gentle it may be. Sometimes the touch you want is simply to be held. Hold my hand. Put your hand on my shoulder. Hug me. Wrap me in your warm embrace. Hold me up. It can be that simple.

Pass these thoughts on to a birth partner who wants to be supportive. Consider them for your own repertoire whenever you’re wanting to offer Comforting Touch. Sometimes one will do the trick, but most of the time you’ll weave in and out of all of these. Remembering also the importance of NO Touch along the way. What a gift it can be to have breaks from sensation of any kind.